accident

   Yesterday I went to Robby’s house to watch the New Orleans Saints game with him.  After the game was over, we headed back to campus in separate cars.  Robby’s vehicle was in front of me, with maybe one or two cars between us.  I was on the ramp to the bypass when I skidded on the slick road.  My instinct, of course, was to slam on the brakes.  Suddenly I was off the road completely, in the grass.  I was heading for the trees.  I tried to whip my car around so I wouldn’t run into them, but I no longer had control.  I knew I was going to hit the trees.  I watched them rush toward me.  “Oh my God oh my God oh my God oh my God!” I cried.
   Then my car stopped.
   I wasn’t dead.
   I wasn’t hurt.
   The trees had not broken the window.
   I began screaming through my tears.  “Oh God oh God oh God!”  I somehow had the presence of mind to complete a couple important tasks, though:
- I crawled over to my passenger side to get out of the vehicle (since the trees were blocking the driver’s side).
- I put on my hazard lights.
- I knew I wanted to lock the doors after I left, so I made sure I didn’t lock the car keys inside.
-  I gathered up my stuff and exited my car.
   There I was, stumbling along the edge of the highway in the cold wet grass.  I was sobbing hysterically.  Every few feet I would practically collapse onto the ground.  I didn’t want to keep walking.  I wanted to lay down and just stop time for a bit–this was too much to grasp.  But I couldn’t do that.  The ground was cold, wet, and muddy.  I kept walking.  I thought I would make it back to the Steak & Shake right before the exit ramp, and there I could call—who?  Whose numbers did I have memorized?  I didn’t have my cell phone with me.  I thought I’d call Dad, who could give me my brother’s phone number.  My brother could drive from his house about 25 minutes away and come pick me up.  Yes, that’s what I’d do.
   As I was stumbling along in the grass, I saw a young man start running toward me.  I figured someone had seen me and stopped to help.  From a distance, I thought the young man looked handsome.  I honestly do remember thinking that.  The man was wearing a nice shirt and tie.  Then I realized: It was Robby!
   Robby had happened to glance in his rearview mirror just in time to see my car spin off the road.  He later told me that he was about to call me to tell me to be careful, since I didn’t have my cell phone with me.  I had even mentioned to him, before, that I better not get into an accident.
   He was my savior.  He held me until I stopped crying.
   Robby said that when he tells our friends about his heroism, he’s going to change the details.  “I was running barefoot to find her…and there she was, crawling away on all fours….”
   We were able to joke around even during that chaotic time.  When the firemen showed up, I leaned toward them and said, “You know those women drivers.”  Then Robby just had to remind me about the time when I was driving his car, and he was in the passenger seat, and I started going down the wrong side of a boulevard.
   I didn’t even know that if the police catch you after you’ve been in an accident, they can fine you for reckless driving.  We thought we’d gotten away scot-free with just the firemen and the tow truck, but right as we were about to drive away, those flashing red and blue lights approached us.
   “Uh-oh,” Robby said.  “It’s the po-po.”
   The officer was kind enough not to, as he said, “add insult to injury.”  He didn’t give me a citation.  I never did shake the officer’s hands, but I shook the hands of each of the firemen and the hand of the tow truck driver from Triple-A.  The firemen were so kind.  They actually had to use a saw to cut my car out of the tree branches before the tow truck could haul it out.
   I am so thankful I didn’t get hurt.  I didn’t know what was going to happen when I realized that I was going to hit the trees.  I am also so grateful that Robby just happened to glance back and witness the accident, especially since I didn’t have my cell phone.  I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to see him.
   I’ve tried to offer prayers of gratitude up to God for sparing my life, but the prayers seem so insignificant.  They don’t seem to properly repay God for his mercy.  Should I have had a closer brush with death, so my prayers would seem more heartfelt?  How can I convey to God and to myself how grateful I am/should be?
   (For the record, after the accident happened, I wasn’t saying God’s name in vain.  I promise.)
   I kept waking up last night, thinking about the accident.  What could I have done differently?  How could I have corrected my car?  What if I had slid further, hitting the light pole instead of the trees?  What if Robby hadn’t seen me?  What if another car slid off the road and ran into me?
   I am still pretty weak and shaky.  All day long I listened to “Guardian Angel” by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.  It was only appropriate.